The Kind of Friends We Used to Be (The Secret Language of Girl Trilogy)

Interest LevelReading LevelReading A-ZATOSWord Count
Grades 4 - 8Grades 5 - 10n/a5.840314
Kate and Marylin are best friends forever....

Well, except for last year when they weren't friends anymore....

And except for this year when they both want to be friends again, but just don't know how.


But the thing is, even as they are trying to fix their broken friendship, they are becoming more and more unalike. And that's becoming harder and harder to deal with. Well, it would be a lot easier if Kate would just take some of Marylin's fashion advice. Ballet flats would look so much better than those big black combat boots. Feminine. But Kate doesn't want to be feminine. She wants to learn guitar and write her own songs; she wants to be the exact opposite of the middle-school cheerleaders. And maybe if Marylin would just stick up for herself and not get bullied by Mazie (the Meanest Cheerleader Ever) into judging anyone who's the least bit different, Marylin and Kate could be real friends again.

Funny, realistic, and incredibly insightful, Edgar Award-winning novelist Frances O'Roark Dowell explores the shifting terrain of middle-school friendship in the companion book to the well-loved The Secret Language of Girls.
Paperback, 256 pages
Published on April 27, 2010 by Atheneum Books for Young Readers
ISBN-10: 1416997792
ISBN-13: 9781416997795
17 Book Reviews
  • looloo123
    looloo123Thursday, January 19, 2017 at 4:23 pm33 stars
    This book doesn't have a satisfying ending to me. But I give it 2 stars
    • norzie452
      norzie452Tuesday, September 29, 2015 at 8:30 am22 stars
      The book that I recently finished is called The Kind of Friends We Used to Be by Frances O'roark Dowell. This book is about these two friends, Kate and Marylin that used to be best friends but slowly grew apart from each other. They both want to be friends again, but don't know how. While they are trying to fix their relationship, they are just becoming more unalike every second. Kate wants to learn guitar and wear big black combat boots while Marylin wants to make sure she looks her finest and wants to make sure her cheerleader friends still like her. But when they both discover new people their view of things change a bit. I have been meaning to read this book forever, but I never got the chance too. I didn't really like this book as much as I thought I would because it didn't really have a huge climax and I didn't really like how it was narrated in third person narration. I was a little confused on what their background story to their friendship was because I made a mistake by reading the second book in the series without reading the first book. This book is realistic fiction because it could happen and come true, but it hasn't actually happened yet. I would recommend this book to younger girls, about age ten. I think this because this book wasn't that challenging. I recommend this book to girls only because the first book in the series is called The Secret Language of Girls. I am pretty sure that no boys would be interested in that book nor the sequel to it. One example of an external conflict is man vs society because Kate doesn't think she fits in with anyone just because no one else in the grade wants to learn guitar and has big black combat boots like she does. One example of an internal conflict is man vs self because when Marylin doesn't know if she should run for school government just because of Mazie, her friend (also known as the meanest cheerleader alive) intimidating her.
      • volleygal
        volleygalThursday, March 12, 2015 at 8:49 pm55 stars
        Awesome! Love the first book, Secret Language of Girls, and love this as much. I have written a review on that book as well. I would like to see another sequel... Is there?
        • kenz0880
          kenz0880Friday, May 30, 2014 at 7:12 am33 stars
          It was good and worth the read but I wouldn't say it was the best book ever! I ostill think you should read it though!
          • dance_forever
            dance_foreverWednesday, April 30, 2014 at 4:56 pm55 stars
            funny, cute, sassy, girly, & sweet
            • YOYOYOSaturday, November 30, 2013 at 12:00 pm
              I AGREE WITH SINGINGBIRD123. IT WAS NOT A GREAT BOOK.
              • horserocky123
                horserocky123Monday, November 25, 2013 at 2:56 pm55 stars
                i already read the first book and it was awesome
                • edmodo-wdp5efwt8d
                  edmodo-wdp5efwt8dFriday, August 23, 2013 at 1:29 pm
                  awesome book for friendship i think its best for girls though
                  • fabulous688
                    fabulous688Friday, November 16, 2012 at 4:55 pm
                    Yes! It's an awesome book!!
                    • lou_rokz
                      lou_rokzWednesday, September 5, 2012 at 2:34 pm
                      tHIS IS A GREAT BOOK i think this book is best for girls it talk about friendship and us girls have trouble with their friendship i dont want to spoil the story like sparky did